Bom Dia
So if you didn't understand my subject line, I said Good Morning, this is the little fatty you all love. I swear, africa is playing games with my mind, somedays I am looking nice and trim, others I swear I look like a ate a little child, it makes no sense to me. Also my comp likes to tell me im going bald with doesn't help with my self esteem at all. I just think that I am getting old, this morning we played soccer with a bunch of jovens we won, I marked 7 times, it was sick, I nailed a corner kick to when the game, but the jovems all whined and said it didn't count because someone wasn't ready. But it was all good, because two minutes later I nailed a sick shot from mid-field. I really regret not playing soccer now, I might not have been good, but I walk all over the africans, so maybe they would have let me wear a jersey. Oh well. The reason I told that story was because I said I was getting cold right... so this game ended, and I felt really good all game, and then as we walked out my body just started to ache. I am so out of shape, and I think that this is just a sign that my life is on the downhill, but it is all good, I don't want to get old, just live my life have some fun, get married, adopt a couple black children, and then kick the bucket. Sounds perfect right? So as bad as my body hurts, its just a part of the dream. So that was probably really weird, but I can't really think straight, so oh well.
This week though was very hard. On thursday we recieved news that my recent-convert Gina, who I baptized a while ago. So she moved to a place pretty far away and a little crazy, but in the middle of the night her house was robbed and she was raped. It was super sad, and it just hit like a ton of bricks. In that situation, nothing else mattered, we just got to the city as soon as possible. A true tender mercy was that she told us she got out of the house as soon as possible, and that she brought only the clothes on her body and her book of mormon. She hadn't slept for 5 days when we found out and first visited her, and we sat in what was probably the most powerful lesson I have ever sat in on my mission. We had no clue what to say, but the only thing that seemed to make sense was the atonement. Which is something I have been a little weak in in my testimony lately. I realized though as I was bearing my testimony that the advice, "A testimony is only to be found in the bearing of it" is so true. As I went to say I believe in this... Or I believe in that... the words wouldn't come out, because something deep inside me told me that I knew these things were true. I don't think I have ever felt more powerful words leave my lips. They were my words, but they were truths that I have learned for myself. I gave her the same advice that was given to me almost 6 years ago. You have two options: Embrace God, or push him out of your life completely. God didn't make it hurt less, he didn't take the pain away. He did the same thing he did for the people of Alma. I became strong enough to bear the burden. I have seen this happen countless times on the mission. And I am learning more of it every day. Only now that I have the oppurtunity to be the person brings the Palavras de Deus(word of God) do I have the oppurtunity to remember and learn for myself that Jesus Christ is the Word. When we share our testimonies we share Christ with the people who listen. As an ordained representative of Jesus Christ, I am only starting to get a glimpse of the significance of this designation. I had the oppurtunity to be the mouthpiece for my Heavenly Father, and Jesus Christ. For those of you preparing to serve a mission, never forget that you are ordained to represent the Lord Jesus Christ himself. His words are yours, his actions are yours. And whenever you bring Christ into the life of someone, you are blessed immensely with more personal knowledge. Only this week did I learn my answer to why after nearly 6 years I can't simply forget the things that happened to me the day I lost my father. I vividly rememebr every minute from that morning. But the thing I learned is that these things that happen in our life cut us, not physically, but spiritually. And its like stitches. I nearly cut my finger off 4 years ago, it hurt, forever. I have an ugly scar that I see everyday, that reminds me of what happened, and the stupid things I shouldn't have done. But, I wouldn't take away that scar for a billion dollars. The Atonement is the same way. I can't forget these events because they made me who I am today. Do they still hurt, sometimes, but not a ton, and not for long. But without them, what would I not have. For me it took 6 years and a traumatic situation of someone I love to figure it out. But I testify, that the atonement is the most real thing we have. I can't express my graditude for it. I know that through Jesus Christ, Gina will be healed. I can't imagine her life had she not recieved the missionaries 6 months ago. That is our purpose as missionaries. I am a living, breathing, and Imperfect representative of the Ressurected, Breathing, and Perfect Savior of the World. I have felt his words leave my lips, and I have seen his healing power touch lives. Only 3 days ago did I have the oppurtunity to be the Tool by which he alleviated nightmares that kept Gina from sleeping for 5 days. She slept without a problem since then. It wasn't me, I have no power like that. I only was blessed enough to be the tool by which Our Savior healed her. I am so grateful for that. And if any of you ever wonder why I am serving, this is why. I have the oppurtunity to bring Jesus Christ into the lives of all the people I talk. And as he touches them, it touches me. I know He lives. His atonement is real, and there exists no thing on this earth that is not subject to his immense power. I am his Representative. I have seen his hand only this week. His words are mine. I love him so much. And I am so grateful for the oppurtunity which I have to walk side by side with Him every Day. He is my fourth companion. Elder Brown, Jesus Cristo, and My father. This is the true church, and 2 years is not enough time to repay him for all he has done for me, I hope that you all will use his atonement, and be healed, he will touch your life, I know this without a doubt. The door is open, you just have to choose to walk through. Obrigado por suas orações e amor. Estou imensamente grato por seu apoio.
Com Amor,
Elder Anthony Holt
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